Gaining Insight Into Yourself as a Helper

Gaining Insight Into Yourself as a Helper

Gaining Insight Into Yourself as a Helper

by Kimberly Glover -
Number of replies: 2

1. An individual lost his job and was in the process of trying to get into another career field. My motive was to help him discover which path to take.

2. I feel like I helped him realize why he wasn't getting the jobs he was applying for, which made him reach out to me more. I think he appreciated the honesty I was giving him.

3. I was his accountability partner and I also was one of the very few people in his life that gave him honest answers. I helped him realize what was realistic and what was not. I wish I would've connected him with a male professional because he may have received what I was saying a little better.

4. There was a lot of things said that I did not agree with. I responded calmly and gave him information based off my experiences.

5. I've learned that there are some people that you can't help. I also learned to not be so hard on myself because I sometimes feel like if I don't hear what I want to hear from someone I've helped; I automatically assume that I've done or said something wrong.  

In reply to Kimberly Glover

Re: Gaining Insight Into Yourself as a Helper

by Charise Wilson -

Hello Kimberly,

Thank you for your honest responses and for sharing. This experience helped you to see that sometimes the helping model can have challenges but when we reflect on the chapter we also learn that we are merely there to guide, mentor, and support each individual on their personal journey. We meet individuals where they are at and sometimes this is difficult because we see their potential and where we know they can be but the timing may not be right for them and/or it might take them longer to process what we are trying to share. When we help them to develop their own personal action plans and walk alongside them, listen to their needs, and honor their priorities we can really make a lasting impact that may open doors to future growth on their end. It's tough being a "helper" sometimes but I'm glad to see that it has not dissuaded you from moving forward and continuing to grow as a career practitioner!

You are doing great work, keep it up, go shine, and go share - and always remain aware through strong listening techniques! You got this!

Best,

Charise

In reply to Kimberly Glover

Re: Gaining Insight Into Yourself as a Helper

by Jessica Mitchell -

Kim,

Thanks so much for sharing your insight! I learned from your insight into your own helping skills that the accountability piece is important in a helping relationship. I think this is one thing I struggle with when wanting to maintain a positive conversation and hope for my students- I will still deliver these messages but I think sometimes I sugar coat them a bit too much. Something I'm working on is utilizing my intake process to gauge the type of feedback/level of support an individual student needs as I've realized different students need feedback in different ways and I've always delivered my harder messages in a more uplifting way and I think sometimes it just doesn't come across accurately depending on who I'm working with.

In my post I also talked about how its hard to help when the person you're helping is very down on themselves. I think this is where I need to work on practicing my empathy whereas now I default to *inspiring and engaging* but I think for me I need to be more aware of meeting the student where they are and encouraging them in a more tailored and supportive way instead of being the vocal cheerleader. 

Thanks so much for sharing, again! Your answers helped me reflect on my own helping style! :)